The Fear Behind the Smiles

Brian Andrew, aka The HypnoSpawn

Been a while, I know, but there's been things afoot. Like giving birth to my son....

Saturday, November 19th, my water broke..... in the middle of a pizza joint. I made it to the bathroom and to the toilet (thank you, kegel!) before any major leakage, but then realized as the water continued to flow that I had no idea how the hell I was going to get OUT of the bathroom and to the hospital. I made it, with much clenching and praying.... and toilet paper.

Got to the hospital, went through labor sans epidural (ouch), and ended up having to have the HypnoSpawn vacuumed out of me. My doc's words when describing the vacuum procedure: "I'm not going to sugar coat it, it's going to feel like I'm putting the baby back into you."

'Go for it', says I, riding the hell out of those endorphins and screaming profanity to rival a fleet of sailors. Three layers of stitches later and several offers for Vicodin for the pain, and I was in the room and holding the lil spawn. Happy to say I got through the aftermath with a few ice packs and some Motrin.

We dropped by our neighbor's to show off the lil spawn, and she asked who the doc was that delivered the bebbe. Then she went on to let us know how great he is and how he's a member of her church and helps out with charities, etc. and all I could think of was the number of times I dropped the f*bomb in the course of labor. Then I wondered if I should send an apology card to the maternity ward at the hospital after that, cuz I had to have made some ears bleed.

The sort of funny part in all of this is that I haven't slept as good as the night I was in labor....

Spent the majority of today sampling music I had played for the lil one while he was in utero, and happy to say he still likes the music.

What's All This Business About a Vampire Tadpole?

I went to the doctor and got these vitamins complete with fish oil gelcaps. Luckily the blue pills are chewable, and they don't taste too bad at all.

Mostly what I'm indicating in this picture is the insane overpackaging of these vitamins. These came one blister pack per box- yes, there was even a cardboard box on top of it. To quote my nephew, "I was like WHAT?!"

For those who have friended me on Facebook and follow my wacky hijinks (thanks! :) ), you may have noticed mention of the vampire tadpole's immenent arrival.

In fact, here's the exact status update: "The vampire tadpole has been sighted. Expect world dominance by December and bow before it!"

So aside from following the whims of something that doesn't even have a brain yet, I've been thinking.... We are at our most powerful when we're mere cells in the womb. We have pure dominance over the woman carrying us, and thus have dominance over those she holds sway over.

One example is my sudden love of breakfast foods. I went from being an advocate for sleeping til noon and skipping breakfast entirely to checking out the Breakfast Anytime! sections of various eating establishments. Fried eggs and toast seem downright heavenly, and orange juice has become something we keep in supply. Pancakes even look good practically anytime where I rarely used to eat them.

More details on the vampire tadpole to come. In the meantime, I need to go eat something.

Mini-Hiatus... Kinda

Took a brief mini-break from the interwebs this past weekend. I did things like go outside, catch up on much-needed rest, and.... read a BOOK. Not an electronic book, but an actual printed page book. Mr. Pants, my house panther, was all about this break from electronic bondage and decided he would help me in my efforts by pinning me to the couch. He also inspected every bite of food I ate... you know, in case it was poisoned.

My trusty sidekick and I even took long walks through the backyard where he got his fill of watching the hell out of birds and squirrels.

It made me realize something.... I need a break.

While I will be on email and such daily (it can't be helped), starting tonight I will be taking a bit of a hiatus from the electric leech.

Expect new stories and shop updates upon my official return, but in the meantime, feel free to browse my previous posts and read the stories I've written.

Enjoy them all with a good cup of coffee or tea, prefereably outside or near a window where you can get some sunshine or some moonlight.

Bon nuit, mes amis electronique.

~ Suzi M

Suzi M's Amazon Author Page - All Published Suzi M works available

 

News and Such.... aka Condoms Are Not Condiments

Floating in the etherverse, there's always a few interesting videos that occasionally make me giggle. One such video played like a latex-clad sex ed science class and featured a condom on a corn dog. Awesomesauce. High school was never that entertaining for me.

Other than stumbling across various YouTube insanity and my borderline Hulu and Adult Swim addictions, I've been jumping back on the writing horse. Pictured here is the stuff of my research (yes, even when writing something as trivial as a horror novel, I do actually do some research - be it to visit the places/live in the places I write about or research the history of places for setting and ambiance).

Note the cup of coffee and small stack of books. While gathering research I came across a book titled Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. How could I go wrong with that? I thought to myself. I was not disappointed. If you dig history, it's a great book. The vampires are more peripheral causes of the action, rather than main characters, which was refreshing.

I also finished reading The Amityville Horror and Nice Girls Don't Live Forever. Broke down and bought a Kindle to spare my poor sagging bookshelves. My plan is to buy antique books and first edition prints from now on, and all the rest can be electronic unless I adore them enough to want to sniff the pages.

Taking a break from the horror/vampire kick I returned to another genre love: noir detective story. The Silent Hour by Michael Koryta is an awesome read so far. Mystery, murder, and mobsters. Sounds catchy, right? And just to keep one foot planted squarely in my stereotype, I'm also reading Death Masks (aka Book 5 of The Dresden Files) by Jim Butcher. LOVE that series. Can't wait for the new book in April or the collection of stories due out around Halloween.

In music land, I've been digging Dixieland, old jazz, and a band called Rome (the gothic folk band, not the rap one if browsing iTunes). A few tried and true fave bands have released some new albums, so have Frontline Assembly, SITD, and Combichrist on a loop.

For 2011, I'm working on some humor projects. Dark humor, but humor nonetheless. Also working on the historical project, too. And.... if all goes according to plan, there may even be a graphic novel in the works. Stay tuned....

Almost Doesn't Count....

Finally calmed down enough to actually post about the 'incident' of last weekend in Scranton, PA.

Long story short: projects I was really looking forward to working on will not be happening. People I was looking forward to working with I will sadly not be working with, at least not on this project. Money I had hoped to get paid for doing this project will also not be arriving. Thank goodness for a day job I love.

Looking on the bright side, I made a new friend.

To the left is me and Maestro. Meeting the wrestlers at last weekend's event was the bright spot in a very gloomy day. They're awesome people, and I hope everything turns out alright for them.

The saddest part of all of this is that the whole thing really had the potential to be something great. All of the names that showed up would not have signed on if they didn't see some potential for awesome things.

The fallout from all of this just keeps falling.

A message in my Facebook inbox finally opened up my rage dam, and all the anger I'd been fighting to hold back this entire past week came flooding out. The time for explanations has long past, but if it should come to needing to explain to me, then a phonecall could have done the trick, or even just say it in the damned Facebook message right then and there. Don't message me to tell me to call someone else so they can explain it. It's horribly unprofessional and disrespectful beyond all words.

There were many responses drafted over the course of one day. All of them I deleted without sending because none of my responses were a professional response, nor should they have been read by anyone who hoped to keep their eyes from bursting into flame.

Suffice it to say, lesson learned in all of this. My burn was not nearly as great as some of the others involved, and I am glad I had not gotten quite so far into the book writing process that it became a major loss to cut the line and go. I did pay my editor out of my own pocket, because I made a promise to her that she would get paid. You see, I keep my promises, and I don't enter agreements lightly. That's as it should be.

After Much Waiting.... It's Here! Cover Stories Officially Released!

What a wild ride, but it's finally done! The international anthology featuring ten writers from around the world is finally available for your ordering pleasure at the Cover Stories Official Storefront.

And for those who are in the know, happy solstice! Couldn't have planned that release better, in my opinion. :)

A Quick Update, with More to Follow...

For those who may not know me that well, I have a few passions. Music, freedom of speech and expression, knitting, photography, writing, etc.... these are a few of my passions.

Trains are another passion, and a big one at that. And not model trains (although I did love my Lionel train set as a child, I must admit), but trains trains. Big, hulking, fast trains. I'm a member of NARP (National Association of Rail Passengers - if you're not a member and take the train/would like more info on getting more transit, JOIN at narprail.org), and I read the newsletters. I got to meet a fellow member on the California Zephyr coming back from Denver (more on that in the next post). We chatted a lot about the sad state of affairs for interstate and local rural access to trains. We noted quite a few broken down abandoned stations along the route into Chicago.

I take Amtrak from Harrisburg to Philadelphia quite a bit for work, and the amount of abandoned stations along the way is depressing. History groups only want fidelity to their ideas of what history looked like, after all, so scrap the connection between Gettysburg, PA and other station stops up to Harrisburg. That train line was only a HUGE reason for the battle to begin with, and a major milestone at that, due to the ability of the north to ship supplies to the troops fighting off the Confederates... but I digress.

According to the latest issue of NARP News, the federal government is giving tons of cash to programs that will increase service and bring a bunch of old Amtrak cars up to date, along with some tracks. This is good. However, there's a project in the works to create another tunnel into NYC that will NOT connect with Penn Station. Huh??? So, being the good citizens they are, folks have been trying to bring this to the attention of Washington, and the reply was basically it's up to local and state to do what they will. Ummmm.... if it's connecting states, shouldn't that be federal?

Sigh... it's like running a marathon, being the winner, and running straight into a brick wall.

Updates and Such

For those following closely across the electric saga, you know I'm on Facebook, MySpace, Livejournal, Blogger, and Twitter (I didn't even realize I was on Twitter, ironically). So, kudos, you know everything that I'm about to post. Feel free to read on for hilarious re-evaluations of situations and phrases, or you may carry on with what you were doing.

In book-land, had the first international sales (thank you, England!!), and apparently my novels are quite popular with the Kindle crowd. Even folks in the distribution land love em. So keep those sales coming!

For your daily dose of instant gratification, click here.

If you prefer to take it from the man, click here.

And below, behold some items from my Etsy shop. If you have an idea for a custom item, please send me a message and I'll be happy to help out. :)

Etsy Buy Handmade Xirconnia

In other news....

Work on the house is finally almost finished!!!!

To the left, the dining room completed, with drapes!

To the right, the living room, one side completed, with drapes!

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Knitting News.... 

The Socktopus is almost done. Two more legs to go, and I'm debating re-doing the body to make it larger. In the end I may have to, as the legs might not fit the original body.

My obsession with lace has begun....

It started as a simple yo, p2, k next row, rinse and repeat to end pattern. Kind of winged it, honestly. Then a thought struck me: I have a crapload of beads that I doubt I will use on anything jewelry-related. I asked Jess how to do the bead thing after reading a super cool pattern from Knitty.com that featured beading.

Jess, in her kind patient way, obliged me and showed me the mystery of beading. And then I started this silk scarf.

I'm now addicted.

And if you look out your window to the left, I finished my goth socks. I got the yarn from Rainy Days and Wooly Dogs on Etsy (yet another addiction... sheesh).

It's self-striping superwash awesome is what it is.

Photo features my gargoyle, Gustav, perched on pot of my fig tree. Yay, Gustav.

And then there was my birthday party....

This was toward the end of the night.

Naturally.

Note the awesome kick-pants.

And then of course there's the new spinning wheel.

I am uber-geek, hear me roar. And spin my own yarn.

Yay!

For the curious: it's a Kromski Sonata. It's portable and has double treadle.

Came with 2lbs of Corriedale, extra bobbins, a matching niddy-noddy, and a Mahagany finish. Win!

And that about sums up the time since I last posted. Wow. Good times.

The Cureness of Bebbe-Nate

Precious incarnate.